Wishful Thinking, Attention, and Luck

Field Notes III.XL: October scenes and wandering thoughts

Welcome to Field Notes!

The leaves are changing color late this year. At approaching mid October, the morning breeze has only now begun to carry an honest chill. It was a different story last year. Even in the aftermath of a devastating hurricane that hit the Southern Appalachians there was an excitement for the seasonal change in progress.

Right now it is the little things, the small scenes, that call for attention. Nature has not yet begun her dramatic fouette jete. It is her subtle gestures and lingering glances that one must attend to with bated breath. These are the intimate moments of connection so easy to miss, but I assure you they are there. You just have to seek them out.

Perhaps its not nature that is different year to year, but the perception of it. Life circumstances are different now. And world events. And I, as a person, am at a different place on the trajectory of life. I couldn’t give you a specific reason why this year feels different. It is like being on a slight grade and realizing the brakes are out. Or like making a trip to the coffee shop just to find out they closed early on a Tuesday.

A small local park embraces a stretch of the Middle Oconee River. I’ve photographed the rocky shoals many times before. It is familiar to the point that I now most often overlook it. But, as the days fly away like migrating birds, I step to these comforting riverbanks, perhaps as a refuge. Perhaps as an anchor point.

I always look to the mountains in autumn, but historically my trips have been short. Shorter trips also means more frequent trips and that may be the source of my subtle sense of shortcoming this season. A larger journey is coming soon this year, overshadowing any other plans. The sacrifice of time, money, and energy to this larger commitment has meant that I haven’t backpacked since early August. I will likely have to wait another year to seek out the bugling elk in the Smokies.

I am restless; eager to walk dirt trails through untamed forests once more. Yet the scale of this upcoming thru hike does cast a shadow of trepidation, I’ll admit. That is a good thing. We need calculated fear to shake ourselves out of complacency.

The familiarity of this park along the river may be just what this moment calls for. The time it takes to go there for a morning is just a small fracture in a calcified routine, but enough to bring focus back to the present. As small and encapsulated as it is, it is just enough to sate my need for nature. It is just enough time in the authentic world to let me think.

Much of philosophy focuses on managing negative emotions- anger especially, but also frustration, sadness, fear, anxiety, etc. These are the unruly street gang of emotions. Positive emotions obviously exist too, though. Joy and happiness stand out. However, a philosophy that is a couple of millennia old understands them a bit differently than we do in our modern context.

One positive emotion that perplexes me is ‘wishing.’ How this is considered an emotion, I do not quite understand. However, it is an accurate translation of the Greek term ‘boulesis.’ From all of the existing primary sources to modern academic studies of Stoic philosophy, this term has multiple nuanced renditions. Clearly, it poses challenges for conceptualization.

Stoic Ethics: The Basics by Christopher Gill and Brittany Polat defines wishing this way-

Wishing (boulesis) is a (correct) belief that a future thing is good, such that we (rationally) reach out for it.

The fact that wishing is defined as a correct belief implies the understanding of what is truly good vs what is indifferent to us. This knowledge and the rationality of the action it inspires puts it in opposition to the negative emotion of desire.

Now, there is often a difficult challenge in rendering the essence of meanings behind words from one language to another. Some ideas may require much deeper consideration of the context of the word, rather than its literal translation. Judith Stove offers an extensive study of the concept of wishing in her article in Stoicism Today titled Wishing, Willing, or What? Exploring Stoic Boulesis. She explores this word in multiple sources with its many slight variations and offers us the following-

One option might be to understand hormē/appetitio as ‘motivation,’ ‘pursuit,’ or ‘effort,’ and boulēsis/voluntas as ‘deliberative or constructive or intentional or productive focus,’ or simply ‘focus,’ ‘attention,’ or ‘concentration.’ These renderings bring positive connotations around functional preparation for a task, while restoring, for boulēsis, the indispensable element of purpose: we cannot achieve anything without it.

So, we might understand wishing or wishful thinking as focused attention. I still struggle to see that as a positive emotional state, but I can absolutely accept it as a positive state of mind.

Now, if you will, follow me on my own very non-rigorous path of reasoning. Through philosophy we seek to live in accordance with nature. However, just as with words, translations, and concepts, our understanding of nature has changed a bit in the last 2000 (give or take) years. If we seek updated understanding of ancient words, might we also consider an updated understanding of nature?

What is the current forefront of our understanding of nature, the universe, and reality? I would suggest that it is quantum physics. I won’t pretend to know quantum physics or even try to relate it to you. However, there is a concept in it that relates to our discussion. This is the realization that some particles change their behavior and character depending on whether or not they are being observed. These particles we are referring to are fundamental constituent pieces of material reality.

Vadim Zeland is a Russian quantum physicist with some pretty wild ideas about manifestation and parallel timelines. Let’s leave that rabbit hole alone, but consider at least some of the ideas behind it. Zeland proposes that thoughts, emotions, and energy influence your experience in life. Wanting something strongly, aka desiring it, actually creates energetic turbulence that pushes it away. The universe is creating balance to the excess potential of desire by placing obstacles in its way. The answer is to treat what you want as ‘nice to have,’ but maintain an attitude of magnanimity. A calm confidence attracts opportunity and synchronicity.

I haven’t looked very much into Zeland’s works, so I cannot comment on how true they may be or even how much I accept them. Still, let us take the ideas above and re-phrase them into our discussion.

Particles, and therefore at least part of the universe and nature, are affected by our observations. Nature is affected by what we devote attention to. But, desire is a negative emotion based on misguided understanding of what is good. It creates an energy that may actually push the good away.

Instead of desire we have wishing, or focused attention. It is based on an understanding of what is truly good. And what is it that we should wish for? We should wish for things to unfold exactly as they do and focus on living honorably, come what may. In that way, we never fail to get what we are seeking.

Demand not that events should happen as you wish; but wish them to happen as they do happen, and you will go on well.

-Epictetus, Enchiridion 8

So, this focused attention on nature unfolding exactly as it does leaves us in a state of quiet confidence and magnanimity. That is the calm energy state that Zeland suggests invites opportunity and synchronicity.

Perhaps when we maintain this attentiveness nature responds in a positive way because of the fact that she is observed. I don’t think I can wish myself a fortune or endlessly fun free time. But I do think that this positive state of mind could reveal itself in subtle and wonderful ways that require patience and practice to appreciate.

This is a small change in perspective, but makes a big difference.

These ideas lend me an unexplainable certainty that nature is on my side. It’s not that things will always go my way. But the potential is there. We may call it synchronicity, or opportunity, or just luck. I’d like to think that the more we remain open to it, the more often nature will offer it.

So, I keep exploring the local scenes as I prepare for my upcoming big adventure. Focused attention is meditation. It takes practice, but the benefit is in the process itself. Then, when this journey begins, I know I’ll be prepared to embrace all that is offered. Wish me luck!

I hope you’ve enjoyed this wander through Ben Burton Park and through the forest of my thoughts! Exactly one week from today I’ll be setting off on a thru hike of the Bartram Trail. I’ll try my best to have an issue of Field Notes scheduled for next Sunday. After that it will be some notes from the field!

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